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HOW TO DEAL WITH BEING CALLED OUT
From the January issue of
THINK AND DIE THINKING
You are teenage girls and you feel the exact same way EVERYBODY else does…
So stap feeling like a special snowflake that is the only one that feels pain.
teenage girls experience oppression from sexism and ageism combined.
teenage girls are told more than anyone else that our emotions aren’t valid, that we are “crazy,” “bitchy,” “hormonal.”
we are taught to be competitive and hate each other, and everything that is associated with teenage girls is ridiculed or dismissed
we as teenage girls experience some of the harshest forms of sex shaming and body policing, and i’m not just talking older teenagers here, i’m talking 13 and 14 year olds.
no, we’re not the only people who feel pain, but this post is pointing out and fighting against specific kinds of oppression that we experience.
(Source: lesbolution)▲24864 | reblog
When I first came out I identified as ‘gay’. I now identify as ‘queer’ when describing my sexuality. I have pre-dominantly remained what many would recognise as a ‘lesbian’ for many years, only having relationships or sleeping with women.
A few things happened that really opened my eyes to the opportunities for attraction. The first was seeing a male friend after a long time and finding him incredibly attractive; he was a friend albeit one I hadn’t seen in a few years, but I trusted him as a person. That was key at that time. I initiated it and we had a really lovely, pleasurable sexual time together
The second was finding myself attracted to someone who was transgender; this person had an aura of openness and ‘comfortableness’ with who they are and how they moved with it was just, well arresting. This person was ‘f to m’ trans. I could not take my eyes of him and I nearly asked him out on a date there and then.
All of a sudden it felt as if I was opening up against the way I had thought about attraction. I started to look around at everyone from that moment on. I started to feel that for me, the identity of ‘gay’ or ‘lesbian’ just didn’t cut it. It was too tight-fitting and not at all flexible and I didn’t want to be constrained in my exploration of this by any label.
“Unlocking the Queer in Me: my journey from Goldstar lesbian to all embracing queer” (dykeroad.com)
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Who makes these?! I can’t remember where I found this picture but I really, desperately need this patch.
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Above: Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie at the Commonwealth Lecture 2012. “Connecting Cultures”
“I recently spoke at a university where a student told me it was such a shame that Nigerian men were physical abusers like the father character in my novel.
I told him that I had recently read a novel called American Psycho, and that it was a shame that young Americans were serial murderers.”
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ATTN: “You look great! Have you lost weight?” is not a compliment. I know it has been the go-to praise-route towards many women since the inception of puberty, but I’d like to put an end to it. Why do I hear this like a broken record every holiday?
- You look great! How are your new jobs going?
- You look great! How is your blog doing?
- You look great! Things seem to be going really well for you lately.
- You look great! You’ve been smiling all weekend.
- You look great! I love your dress/hair/shoes/demeanor.
- You look great! You seem really happy.
- You look great! (Period).
I don’t know who started the rumor that “Have you lost weight?” is just about the goddamn nicest thing you can say to a (fat) woman. Let me assure you: it’s not. I haven’t done anything right or wrong or good or bad for appearing to weigh less than the last time you saw me. Don’t congratulate me.
Use your head. Or, at the very least, be more creative with your compliments.